Peace and Perspective

I'm feeling so much more peace now. I'm thankful to have family and friends praying for me.

Of course I'm sad and anxious that our little cat, Sasha, is missing and I hope she's not gone for good. I brought her home a year ago from a shelter. She has seemed so at home with us spending her evenings sitting in my husband's lap, waking us up early in the morning for breakfast, rubbing her little head against our hands, purring endlessly. We've treated her for ear infections and bought expensive special food for her because of her digestive problems. But she's probably over ten years old and who knows how many other families she's lived with or how much of her life has been spent fending for herself? Two days ago she went out the dog door, which she started doing months ago. I had intended for her to be an indoor cat, but she figured out the dog door and seemed to enjoy just puttering around the back yard and sitting in the sun. About a week ago I noticed her go through a hole under the fence, but she came back pretty quickly and  I realized she might have done that before. I know lots of pet cats are outdoor cats and do just fine. Being a cat mom is still relatively new to me. Some of  my friends have told me their cats take off for days at a time and always come home, but I still I find myself worrying about Sasha and praying that she'll be alright.

But mostly I'm feeling more peaceful than I was yesterday. I still don't know what's going to happen with my FMLA claim. We faxed paperwork to the doctor's office again and are hoping it's the right paperwork this time and that they fill it out to the insurance company's satisfaction. I probably won't even know if it's approved until after surgery, but I'm determined not to worry about it anymore.

Either way, I am going to have surgery on Wednesday, I have health insurance to pay for it, my cancer was caught early, I have over 200 hours accrued sick time, don't expect to need anywhere near that much and even if the FMLA doesn't come through, I'm sure I wouldn't lose my job for taking time off for cancer surgery. I just don't want to fret about it anymore.

After my surgery I'll come back to a comfortable home and a loving husband and son. I hope Sasha will be here, but there will be at least four other furry friends to welcome me home.

I am reminded once again of my many blessings.

I was reading about how people in underdeveloped nations have such higher death rates and suffer so much more from all types of cancer, because it's seldom caught when it's treatable and there aren't many treatment options available to them anyway. That helped give me some much needed perspective.